Black Bean Burritos and Independence

THIS KID.

(I'm using these photos even though they have nothing to do with the story. At least they are recent shots of this kid.)

THIS KID.

So he got out from soccer practice and, of course, he was hungry. As I was driving him home, he asked about what he could eat.

More spaghetti? NO. 

Leftover chili-lime chicken and rice? *Wrinkled nose*

Salad? I'm going to have salad.  Ew, Mom. 

OK, I said. You can have whatever you want, but you have to make it. And clean it all up. Everything?  Yes. Everything you use. Spotless. Because Papa and I have already cooked and cleaned, and we are done for the evening.

He decided on a bean burrito. That meant he had to open a can of black beans. Find the colander. Rinse and season the beans. Roll them up with grated cheese in a tortilla. Microwave it. Not particularly hard, but he is a nine-year-old.

He did it. A few questions about where to find things like cumin and granulated onion and garlic powder...but he did it. AND he cleaned up!

After all was said and done, he came to me so proudly. I had two burritos and a side of beans, Mom! I did it all myself!

(I did not mention how TWO bean burritos AND a side of beans would probably not feel so good tomorrow.)

And now he's in bed reading a chapter of To Kill a Mockingbird, which I handed over to him two nights ago because he has read everything else that is remotely appropriate in our house, and we haven't had time to go to the library. AGAIN. And we have a lot of books in this house. Fat books. Entire series of fat books. He has read them all. Sometimes more than once.

One of the coolest things, I think, is watching your kids mature into the capable, interesting people you hope they'll be. THIS KID. He's totally getting there.

First Day: Elementary School Style

Watch out, World. Sadie Lou has officially joined the ranks of elementary school yahoos.

On Monday, these two started school - Sadie in kindergarten and Benjamin in third grade.

Yes, she donut rolls her socks. Totally her idea.

We are already hearing tall tales of what goes down at school. I have to dangle this out there for our wildly imaginative, drama-stirring-up girl: "I am going to email your teacher about that to see if she tells me it's true." Sadie will inevitably retract whatever story was told...the one about being sent to time-out for half a day, or watching movies in class (on Day 2?!), or about how another kid was already kicked out, or how her friends swapped food with her at lunch in order to trick their moms. (Seriously, whaaaaat?)

She comes by it honestly, though. Ever since watching the movie Big Fish, the Papa decided he needed to be that kind of figure in the kids' lives. Breakfasts are often spent discussing how he had a prodigious mustache when he was a mere infant. You can see where she might want to join the ranks of the grand  storytellers.

But things are off to a good start, barring the disappointing reality of homework. And long days. I try to make up for it with interesting after school snacks, however, three days in and I am already straining for ideas. The Papa and I are pretty excited that everyone crashes into bed by 7:00 and hardly a peep is heard after about 15 minutes. YES.

TOP FIVE FOR THE FOUR

Bella Roux:

1. She loves putting on and taking off and putting on and taking off shoes and hats. Everybody's shoes and hats.

2. She climbs into and out of her high chair by herself - even scooting the little stool over so that she can climb up.

3. If she's squawking and you say, "Bella!  Sleepytime!" she will lay her head down, close her eyes, and stick her thumb in her mouth in about one second flat. (She doesn't stay that way for long, though.)

4. We're pretty sure she's left handed.

5. Lately she's been into climbing on things and then jumping onto the nearest couch or chair.

Benji (who prefers "Ben" when being introduced to new peers):

1. Legos, Legos, all things Lego - he loves building.

2.  Moving, moving, all things moving - He says he was "born to move" and, indeed, unless he's building, reading, or sleeping, he is in constant movement...jumping on the trampoline, rolling off the coffee table, dancing, riding his bike, leaping off the couch, or attempting to wrestle a sibling. He started gymnastics a couple of months ago to help him channel his energy.

3. Pokemon cards are his new favorite thing. He's not up on exactly how to use them, but he does collect them. If you want to make his month, send him a rare one or something from Stage 2 or something with a high HP number or holograms. (You know, not the boring regular ones I get him from the bulk dealers.)

4.  As always, science, comic books, whodunit stories, spies, bad guys, dragons, and adventures rank high on his reading choices.

5. He continues to astound us with his observations on life, people, struggles, family interactions, scientific explanations for things related to biology and physics, and so on. He is one brilliant little dude.

P.S. He is going into 2nd grade in the fall. Where did the time go?!

Oliver, aka Oli Bug:

1. He can ride a bike!  With training wheels, of course, but he just loves it, so he'll probably figure the balance part out soon. He is also good with a scooter, but the bike is his favorite.

2. He also enjoys building - though he is still at the Duplo level. (Tiny Legos continue to end up in his mouth.)

3. Oli might be our future artist. Painting and coloring are things he really enjoys and does well.

4. He needs help taking off his shirt, but other than that, he can dress himself on his own!  And he's been brushing his teeth by himself, too! His favorite shirts: the red dinosaur t-shirt and the khaki monster truck shirt.

5. He is the most cheerful helper, and genuinely enjoys putting dishes away from the dishwasher.

Sadie Lou:

1. The "warrior princess" is living up to her name. She recently started gymnastics, and every week one of her coaches is shaking her head in amazement at this girl's strength. (I am NOT exaggerating.) She jumps higher than everyone on the tramopline, requires no assistance hanging from bars or doing splits in the air, and thinks it's tremendous fun to shuffle herself out to the middle of a bar that is 10 feet above the foam pit and drop from it. All the while, her fearless face has a huge grin on it.

2. She is also riding a bike with training wheels, and protests the idea of taking them off.

3. She can watch a movie or hear a song once, and and say or sing whole parts of it. Her memory for words and inflections is excellent.

4. She is a masterful artist of people - she knows intuitively how best to encourage someone, pick on a weak spot, get someone to do something for her (while they don't even realize she is in charge), and make a person feel like they are the only one in the room with her. She reads body language, tone, and nuances, and is very good at using them herself. This, combined with her love of people (she makes friends everywhere we go...even with adults) and her ability to delegate effortlessly, makes me think she will be a great leader one day.

5. Her style makes her look like a modern day Punky Brewster. Tall or mismatched socks with fancy shoes, a variety of colors and patterns, and even incongruent hairdos (one side has a braid, the other a pig tail) form the basis of her mode de rigueur.

Sadie, Squeak Monsters, and Breakfast

In this first video, Sadie is nearly three. We had stopped at the grocery store on the way home from somewhere, and while Papa ran inside for a few items, I was having trouble keeping Sadie occupied. Can you imagine why? Little Miss Bright Eyes does not sit still...pretty much EVER.



And here, at three and a half, she is helping Papa make breakfast - part of the morning routine - in a princess dress, of course.

Down by the Bay

After cheering for my sister at her 10K down at Paradise Point just before Christmas (where she placed 2nd in her age group - Go, Rosie!), we took the kids to the bay so we could feel the sand between our toes.

The water lapping at our feet, the breeze, the sunshine on our faces - it was all so peaceful.

Peaceful doesn't just happen in a family with four young kids (wink, wink). Such a refreshing few moments.

I tried to photograph each of the kids individually. The girls don't really sit still right now.

I'll wrap up with a little video:

Hanging Out with Bella Roux

If you've seen Miss Bella Roux in person, she's probably been a serious little thing. She's definitely not one to make you feel welcome. But around the house where she is comfortable, she lets loose - chattering, stumbling-walking, crawling as if she's on a track, throwing things, shrieking, and often laughing with her head thrown back. She does have a personality - she just has to warm up to people.

Anyway, here's a little video of her playing around with us and her current walking ability. She was officially walking at 15 months...December 2014.

Summer of Swimming - Part 2

This has been a very exciting time in our household. Not only did Benjamin become really comfortable in the water (and pretty much able to swim), Oliver suddenly decided that playing in a pool is actually quite fun. We already know that bold little Sadie has always enjoyed herself in any environment. 

So here are some photos of EVERYBODY having fun!  I'm just going to stop writing now and let you enjoy the images. 

Summer of Swimming, Part I

For the previous two summers, we have tried to help Benjamin learn to swim. The thing is, he's just not the kind of guy who learns well in a group class in a busy pool. First there are all the distractions of a hectic environment - and of course he is observing it all...the kids in the more advanced class diving for rings, the lifeguard talking to a child on the deck, an old man shuffling to the hot tub, the Bandaid coming off of someone's knee in his own class.

If that were not enough, he is also feeling insecure about his own ability to swim, and he's feeling shy about being in a class with kids he doesn't know, and he's trying to figure out just how serious the instructor is about keeping order. As a result, his coping mechanisms kick in: clowning around and trying to make the other kids laugh, talking baby talk because that is how he feels inside, acting like he doesn't understand the expectations, because, we all know, sometimes it's easier not to participate, especially if we are afraid we might fail.

But I've got this kid's number.

So when someone gifted us with some money for extracurricular experiences, we put some of it toward private lessons for Benj and Sadie. And what do you know? In five lessons the kid learned to swim.

He still attempted his old stunts, but Miss R would gently and firmly tolerate none of it.

As you can see, Sadie was eager to get in, get moving, and get dunked. If the teacher merely mentioned the next activity, Sadie was throwing up her arms and lurching toward her.

Always wearing a smile, even as she sank like a stone, little feet running madly underwater.

Anyway, it worked. While not proficient, Benjamin can at least put his face in the water and attempt to swim from one side to another. No more tears or complaining.

Then there are these two:

They sat with me and watched.  Oli decided that he might like swimming after all. More pictures about that to come!

Catching Up - Kinder Grad!

Last May we had a graduate in the house. For the special day, the kids learned a couple of rewritten pop tunes - hits that got worked over to talk about their school memories, soon-to-begin summer vacation, and going into first grade. It was pretty darn cute.

And ever since receiving that diploma, he has told people that he is in first grade. Pretty excited about that, he was. 

Now that I am finally posting this, we are only two weeks away from school starting. What?! I can hardly believe it.

Gargling Girl

In other news, Sadie has taught herself how to gargle.

Kindergarten, whaaaa?!

First day of kindergarten

I'm guessing I'm not alone when, as a parent of a toddler, I dreamed of the relative ease I believed mamas of school-aged children experienced in parenting. I admit to occasionally (or more than that, truth be told) wanting to hurry up the needy baby years for the joy of the increasingly independent years. I'm sure you more experienced mamas are laughing at me right now - for here is the reality of the first child going off to kindergarten.

1. He's still needy. Why should I be surprised by this? I'M still needy.

2. Neediness is not actually the issue anymore: my baby is going to school for six hours a day! The initial giddiness at having that much time to myself (sort of, I do have Sadie Lou, Warrior Princess In Training, around) has given way to teary-eyed wonder. Wondering where the time went. Wondering if his little self is ready for the challenge. Wondering if I should homeschool. Wondering if I would still like spending time with him if we attempted homeschooling. But most of all, looking with wonder at what a boy of character he has become. He is brave and adventurous, with caution, of course - that is his nature. He likes school - really likes it. And he is thriving in the structure of the classroom.

3. His biggest fear of the first week was that no one would like him (poor baby!). But he made a friend right off the bat - Gabe. He and Gabe played together every day until Friday. On Friday, he met the girl with the "three Velcro-strap shoes" that were "sparkly and colorful." According to Benjamin, she looked like she would make a good friend. I'm not sure if he was more enamored with her or her shoes. He couldn't remember her name for several days, but I have since learned that she is KK, short for Kayla.

4. His biggest problem with the first week was repeatedly getting time outs. He soon discovered that rough housing on the playground was not allowed. He was red carded for karate chopping a pal in the neck so hard that it left a red spot. (One breathless teacher told me that he had "choked" another kid. That sounded like a Nancy Grace version of the events, so I went digging for the truth. Out-of-control karate chops sounds a lot more like my kid.)

5. Now his biggest concern is that Gabe is calling him "the enemy" and rounding up other boys to join in the persecution. The reason, according to Benjamin, is that he now has girl friends - KK and Elliot (yep, she's a girl). He seems not too concerned because he has met another Ben and they play together with the girls. All is well for now, though we might need to invite Gabe over for a playdate some day to break down his apparent feelings of rejection.

6. Most kindergarten programs around here are half day, so I struggle a little with his schedule of 8:00 to 2:30 and his homework that we must then complete. I'm all for rigor, but this little guy is still a little guy. It makes fitting in unstructured play time, household chores, and matters of hygiene a bit challenging. This school makes no apologies for their academic expectations. I am not as personally committed, but it seems to be our best choice for the time, and the clincher is...

7. Benjamin comes home regularly announcing things like: "I want to be a teacher one day!" (He used to want to be a police person and a circus performer - like in Cirque du Soliel. Sounds like he has a steady option to fall back on if being an acrobat doesn't work out for him.) And I told him in the beginning that we were seeing if this school would be a good fit for him. That if it was not a good place for him to learn, we would find the right place. He's an anxious kid, and I wanted to take the pressure off in case he had a hard time adjusting. I had nothing to worry about, because this is what he has to say: "I LOVE this school, Mama!  I don't ever want to leave it!  It is the BEST school!" So that settles the matter.

I will be going in one morning a week to assist in the classroom. I get to teach a reading group or something. I'm really looking forward to watching his wonderful teacher in action and seeing him learning so enthusiastically. We're off to a good start this year.

Catchin' Up with Sadie Lou

At 15 months old...

+ She has 12 teeth in, with three more almost ready to break through.

+ A trail of toys and items from the cupboards follows her everywhere she goes.

+ She still willingly and easily goes down for naps and bedtime. First we snuggle for a minute and sing Dona Nobis Pacem. Then we lay her in the crib, whereupon her right thumb immediately settles into her mouth. Finally, we stroke her cheek for a minute and say goodnight. Her sweet brown eyes follow us out of the room.

+ When she wants water, she madly scrounges around in the drawer looking for the parts of a sippy cup. When she finds the matching parts she chases me down and pushes the cup into my leg.

+ She gets really excited when I hold her up to see the dresses hanging in her closet. She reaches for them, and if I give her a choice between two, she will always pick one.

+ She offers up her feet, arms, or legs when getting dressed.

+ She LOVES playing in the sandbox. She digs, eats the sand, plays with the hose, pets the dog, and must be carefully watched or she will attempt to climb the hill in the backyard. She also picks fruit - both unripe off the tree and rotting on the ground - and will eat it. One must keep a close eye on her!

+ She will climb on and unload anything.

+ She LOVES her big brother. She dove into her car seat this morning because she could see Benjamin in the car already, and she was shouting, "Bee-Jee! Bee-Jee!"

+ She has discovered "playing" the piano. Her other musical interests include running through the house with a shaker in each hand.

+ The rocking horse is a favorite, even if her feet don't reach the footholds. She is also excited to "ride" the tricycle despite her short legs.

+ Our girl LOVES to eat. It doesn't matter if she was just released from her high chair and has a full belly - if she sees you eating food, and you decide not to share with her (as she frantically attempts to grab the food from your hand), she WILL throw a tantrum.

+ She likes to play So Big!, and she will bring a book to you to read to her. She still gets over-the-top excited to see Buckley in the mornings.

+ Tummy zerbers make her laugh hysterically. She's also very into her bellybutton right now.

+ She has started pointing at and learning body parts - nose, eyes, teeth, mouth, hair, and tummy are her favorites right now.

+ She understands what you tell her and will usually follow directions: Close the door, please. Put the sticks down and you can pick up the teapot better. Put the horsie in the basket. Bring me the book.  That sort of thing.

+ Her current list of words:

   Mama, Papa
   Tsssadie! (Sadie)
   Bee-Jee (Benjamin)
   Buh-bee (Buckley)
   dog
   arf-arf (what the doggie says)
   hi, hey
   nana (banana)
   wa-wa (water)
   dow (down)
   dia-poh  (diaper)
   baby
   jeeeeee (cheese)
   haw (hot)
   boo! (peek-a-boo)
   wan diss (Want this. or Want this?)
   soos (shoes)
   ffffffffooooo (food)
   ho-ho-ho-ho-ho and da-dee-da-da (her version of singing in a high voice)

   And she will repeat most things that you say to her - such that someone babysitting her was impressed that she knew "potato," but I'm guessing she just repeated what was said to her.

Sadie's 12-Month Milestones

This post celebrates what she's been able to do in her 12th month -

either just before or just after she turned one year old.

Weight: 22.8 pounds

Sadie can...

* walk AND run!
* say "mama" and "dia-po" (diaper) and "waya" (water), use "all done" in a variety of situations (like when she's done with her nap or a toy or drinking her water)
* throw her toy down and sing "uh-oh" (this is a favorite game now)
* sing with me or to music
* "help" you get her dressed by offering up her arms, legs or feet
* play "so big" by throwing her hands up over her head
* drink from a sippy cup
* play "peek-a-boo"

Sadie can almost...

* go down the stairs backwards

In other news:

Sadie is presently cutting in about FOUR teeth at once.

She recognizes (and is delighted by) aunties and uncles and grandmas and grandpas.

She likes to play the piano, spin around in circles, throw herself on the carpet to roll around, and laugh hysterically with her brother. She's also into teasing - she will run towards you, then run away. Or she will poke her head around a corner until you see her, and then she'll dart off shrieking with laughter.

Want to see how far Sadie's come?

11-Month Update,   Ten-Month Update,   (I missed the nine-month!),   Eight-Month Update,   Seven-Month Update,   Six-Month Update,   Five-Month Update,  Four-Month Update,   Three-Month Update,   Two-Month Update,   and    One-Month Update.

**Note: I am photographing Sadie each month in this chair for one year. Look at past months to see how she's grown!

Bittersweet Goodbye

Sadie is officially off the bottle. On one hand - I am elated. Somewhere around the second month of her life I started daydreaming about the day that would mark the end of bottle-washing. But then...the day came. And it means our little girl, our walking, babbling, sippy-cup-drinking girl is no longer a baby. Wow. That went FAST.

Bon voyage, bottles.

Sadie's 11-Month Milestones

So this post is a month late, but the photo and information in it is accurate.

It just took me forever to post. Being that TODAY IS HER FIRST BIRTHDAY,

I thought I should get this up and then celebrate her twelfth month.

Weight: 21.5 pounds

Sadie can...

* stand (until she realizes she's standing)
* say "all done," "dog," "da-da," "nana" (for banana), and make the sign for milk when she wants some
* walk about 3-4 steps unaided
* get into drawers and take stuff out
* walk while holding onto the couch or table
* sit and look at a book - turn the pages
* hand you a toy, then take it back, then hand it back, then take it back...this makes her laugh
* ring a bell, play drums

Sadie can almost...

* walk any distance

Sadie likes to spin herself dizzy in her Jolly Jumper. One morning after eating breakfast, she spun herself constantly for a good 20 minutes - until she threw up!

She also does a lot of talking: "zuka-zuka-zuka-zuka"  "bahzkowitz-kovitzka" and so on.

Two more teeth made an appearance in honor of her eleventh month - they are moving in on the lower level.

She puts up with a seemingly intolerable amount of nonsense from Benjamin, including getting flattened by his "rough-housing" moves, having toys grabbed out of her hand (by the same individual), and being swung around in her jumpy. Sadly, it only takes about 2.2 minutes of my back being turned for this sort of "big brother" behavior to manifest itself.

Want to see how far Sadie's come?
Ten-Month Update,   (I missed the nine-month!),   Eight-Month Update,   Seven-Month Update,   Six-Month Update,   Five-Month Update,  Four-Month Update,   Three-Month Update,   Two-Month Update,   and    One-Month Update.

**Note: I am photographing Sadie each month in this chair. Look at past months to see how she's grown!

The Birthday Party

Mama decided to keep things simple this year. We went for a party at the park, old school style.

We used some vintage curtains and burlap for table covers - stuff that has been in the sewing closet for a while. (Yes, there is another party in the distance. In fact, there were at least SIX kid birthday parties at the park that day!)

We gave away books as party favors - nice books (some new, some retro) purchased from the thrift store and wiped down with a Clorox wipe.  Cupcakes were served.

Coloring pages printed off the internet were available for kiddos needing a break from the playground.  Yarn and scissors were available for a mask-making activity.

Cans from our pear and diced tomato purchases held napkins. Applesauce and mason jars contained salt water taffy. As we hosted this after lunch, we just provided some light snacks - pretzels and lemonade.  (Benjamin calls them "preNtzles.")

The rangers opened up the one-room museum on site and let the kids look at the taxidermied critters and pottery. They tried to teach us about the Native American history in the area, but pre-schoolers do not have the attention span for all that.

We did get to pet some pelts. Coyotes and skunks are surprisingly soft.

The skunk was a popular pelt.

Ah, my favorite part: the sack race. Here is our beautiful display of thrifted pillowcases especially for this affair.

Eli attempted to hold back the competitors.

Unsuccessfully, I might add. (Look at Benjamin's face!)

So much shouting; so much laughter... (name that tune)

Hannah appears to be in the lead.

But she wasn't - Max and his tall self came in first. Hannah was not so enthusiastic about his victory. But we were feeling so simple, we did not even pass out any prizes! Ha!

Here is the Warrior Princess herself. Someone gave her a tiara. (Don't get used to it, sweetheart.)

Cupcake time!

Singing "Happy Birthday" to the boy. He's working up to the big blow-out.

And here are some more scenes from around the party:

Sweet Zoe and her stylish mama

Sign of a good time: dirty feet!

Soon and Sadie with Papa napping in the background.

Auntie Bek assisting with present opening.

Reading that Uncle Amal and Cousin Judah are going to take him fishing at Lake Dixon for his birthday present.

WAY into the unwrapping of presents.

Auntie Rosie somehow hanging on to Sadie.

Benjamin and Braden

And then there's THIS guy. This guy drove with his parents for three hours to be with us. THIS guy, and his parents, are part of the reason we pursued open adoption in the first place. His mama was my roommate our freshman year of college, and she has remained in my life for 20 years now. She and her husband and this beautiful openness have provided a model for our adoptive relationships.  It seems fitting to be celebrating birthdays and special moments with them.